One of the strongholds over my life when I was growing up all the way till just a few years ago was feeling embarrassed to be seen in the same clothing twice.
It was so bad I would get panicky thinking if I had taken a photo in that outfit before, and if I went to this event or that, would everyone remember that I wore it the last time?
Now that I wear the same thing every other day and that bondage has been broken over my life, I can see how the FEAR OR MEN, INSECURITY, having my identity be in WHAT I WORE, How I dressed, really cripple me.
YES, I did love fashion. YES, I did enjoy dressing up, YES, I enjoyed shopping….and ALL OF THOSE THINGS ARE OKAY! What wasn’t OKAY was that fear and anxiety and insecurity I got which made me feel like If I didn’t always look cool, dressed well, dressed differently, I would be judged.
And do you want to know the honest truth about why I thought that I would be judged??? It was because I WAS JUDGING OTHERS! *GASPS*!!!!
I was SO PROUD of “my individuality” and looked down on others who didn’t dress well to the point of irritation. I was even annoyed with my own husband for wearing the same clothes over and over again. I would roll my eyes at people who didn’t have a “fashion sense” or didn’t pluck their eyebrows. IT WAS ALL ABOUT ME in my head. I thought people were always thinking about what I was wearing and what I was doing.
THE TRUTH IS… people aren’t thinking about you as much as you think they are (am I right?). TRUTH IS that everyone is beautiful in their own way NOT BECAUSE of their makeup and what they wear BUT BECAUSE OF THEIR CREATOR. HE SAID “You are beautifully and wonderfully made”!!! WHO AM I to think otherwise about anyone else, including myself???
I found it very interesting when I was listening to the book “Boundaries” by Henry Cloud when he said that most of the time, we think others are judging us because in some way – we are judging them! The reason why we can come up with those thoughts and those narratives in our heads is because there are similar narratives in our heads about some people and that is why we might think it is possible that they are thinking that way about us! *GASPS!!!!* It was a wake up call, because it was true in many areas of my life!
Once I stopped having expectations of others, I also stopped thinking they had those expectations of me! Once I gave others the space they needed, I also allowed myself to understand that they probably would be able to give me the space I needed. Once I could forgive and not be easily offended, I would also stop thinking that everyone would be offended with me. Once I stopped judging others about their looks and fashion, I also stopped judging myself.
“For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”- Matthew 7:2
THIS ALL HAPPENED ONLY by God’s SUPERNATURAL GRACE upon my life.
AS I RECEIVED HIS GRACE FOR ME, I could have grace for others.
AS I RECEIVED HIS LOVE FOR ME, I could love others.
AS I RECEIVED HIS FORGIVENESS, I could forgive myself and others.
AS I RECEIVED HIS “NO CONDEMNATION” , I could have “No condemnation” for others.
These few days I received a few tags to post a picture of myself because ” I am Beautiful” and I would like to accept this challenge but only because “I am Beautifully Made” In God’s Image and so are ALL OF YOU MEN AND WOMEN! BIG HUGS.