My dad was a pastor and I grew up going to Sunday school but I never knew God.
I did not know the true gospel and all I knew about God were stories that did not make any sense but sounded exciting. I was taught to memorize the 10 commandments, and the books of the bible but it only shaped my understanding of God to be an almighty being of which might or might not truly exist, who was extremely extremely hard or rather, impossible to please.
I could not get it right. I left the church when I was a teenager, finding my way among palmistry, tarot cards, sex, alcohol, gambling and cigarettes – trying to make sense of this thing called Life and love. I did not know yet that it was impossible to fill a void in my life and heart that only the love and presence of the Holy Spirit could fill. I did not yet understand the grace of God through his son Jesus Christ that meant that I was righteous because Jesus has paid for ALL of my sins and that I could now enter into relationship with my real father in heaven because of that, and that it was not ever going to be something I could attain on my own.
It was only till I heard the gospel being preached as it truly was meant to be preached in the book of Romans by Pastor Joseph Prince that I felt like I had heard the good news for the first time in my life. How is it that I had read the bible, knew all the songs and stories but actually did not really understand what the cross meant ? I did not yet have the revelation and I did not have the Holy Spirit. I was not yet a new creation in Christ but I thank God that at the age of 23, I feel like I knew God and was known by him for the very first time.
Hearing the real gospel and being in the fellowship of Christians that were filled with the Holy Spirit, praying in Tongues, believing God for healing, hearing from God for themselves and other people – people who really had an evident relationship with God – started me on my own journey of walking with him.
As I walked and kept hearing the truth, sooo many lies and bondages that one held me down started breaking off my life. Things that I had to once fight off on a daily basis to NOT DO, I slowly had NO DESIRE TO DO as I received this revelation of grace, truth and walked with the Holy Spirit. He daily speaks to me and teaches me all things and I am constantly in a process of unearthing more and more things that are not of God and that could be laid down at the cross. The more we look into the face of the one who died for us, the more we reflect the love we have received.
I am still a work in progress with the Holy Spirit but from the past 10 years of walking with God, I Know that I know that I know that he is real. God is real. Jesus is real. The Holy Spirit is real. The bible is the LIVING WORD of GOD that can only be interpreted and understood with the writer explaining the letter because everything that is read without the voice and explanation of the author can and will be misinterpreted and even abused and taken out of context.
For it is by grace you ( I ) have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves ( Myself) , it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one ( I Cannot) can boast.
Ephesians 2:8-9 New International Version (NIV)