I Don’t Want You, Because I Want You.

Today I finally recognized a pattern in Aletheia’s behavior. I found it very strange that on weekends and whenever daddy was around, that she would slowly start rejecting me. We were fine this morning but by afternoon she started throwing the crayon on the floor that I had picked up for her, and refusing my help when I offered.

It was through a flashback of events that made me realize that she was throwing a tantrum and rejecting me because I did not spend any quality time with her this weekend. It was always when Daddy was around, and I had thought, since he’s around – I would let her spend time with him, and I would go do my own thing – and perhaps she felt like I wasn’t paying any attention to her.

Because – what happened after that confirmed my suspicion. I decided to swallow my “rejection” and go apologize to her. I asked her if she was sad or angry at me, and if she felt that I wasn’t spending enough time with her. I asked her to forgive me… and then she suddenly switched to being happy with me again! Allowing me to hold her hand, help her etc etc as per normal.

How many times has this happened before -where instead of recognizing that my daughter was rejecting me because SHE FELT REJECTED, I started feeling hurt not understanding why, and getting really sad when all she wanted was some time with me?

How many times have even GROWN MEN and WOMEN cried out for HELP this way because they perhaps don’t know how to express themselves, or don’t even know that they are feeling this way?

HURT people HURT people.

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